..oneself! I am imposing/enforcing an experiment on myself?? What does it mean? Is it dramatic? Or is it just a simple confirmation on who I am or in what way I am looked upon, even how I look at myself/ME! The social, happy person making contacts with just about anyone without problems! Often initiating the contact! And this is also with my friends! Or?? Sometimes I feel it is toooooo much of a one way contact/communication!! I often write them a sms or email or phonecall!! ”Go for a beer/coffee?” seldom being the one being called upon! Not that they decline or say NO! But sometimes maybe I am IMPOSING! Because if they have something else they dont have any problems cancel the meeting even if it was decided upon, like you cancel the appointment with your dentist, doctor, hairdresser….! ”Sorry, Torbjörn, something came up! See you next time!”

And I want to say ”Sorry for imposing on your time! Sorry for asking to ask to meet! Take a beer or coffe! I understand you have more important things in life to attend to!”

I have no problems with being a loner, taking a beer or coffee by myself! But I also enjoy company friendship, but not at any cost!

Sometimes this is why I feel like I am an imposer(not imposter!) intruding in peoples lifes. Oblige them to see me/ meet me , but me most of the time initiating the contact like I wrote before!

So my experiment is! Will I ”celebrate” New Years Eve by myself? Because I am not going to ” impose” ask ” Hello! What are you doing? New Years Eve?” because one friend already said that ”something came up!” after we had decided to celebrate!

And I am not going to impose/ask anyone! Just curious if anybody will ask/invite me!

are dead and only the mortals are still alive!

….is often a more cruel and  unnecessary painful Master! Why? The road and journey to death is often more painful than what is adequate! If Death would be summoned to a court of justice It would definetly be sentenced and condemned to a long confinement for Its unjust and cruel behavaior! Why ?

We have enough agony, fear, problem just facing this ultimate sentence! No, but Death is not content/satisfied with having this defining role. Being the Ruler/Master/the Grim Reaper among many titles and credits!

No Death wants more! The road to death is often lined with a lot of pain, suffering, sickness, torture, fear and more! Why??? when ones life is definetly closing in for that final closure/the last breath, Death prolongs it in a undefined lenght of time!

When you have this unquestionable power , ”why add insult to injury” so to say!

My wish for Death is to say Goodbye ! Take the last breath and just pass away! No sickness as a burden on my loved ones or society! No prolonged agony for both myself or loved ones! Within other species / animals this is perfectly accepted!

Why cant Death be content with this? Maybe Death would get a better reputation as to what it has today! Because I feel and think that mankind in general would embrace Death more like a part of life instead of trying to ignore and not take it as a part of life and death! Love Death, dont fear it!

And please dont cheat Death by taking your life!! This is not my point ! Please! I just want to give Death a better reputation if possible! Death is an essential part of Life but with a bad reputation, this is the big difference!

We are and Never will be Immortals! So deal with it! Because you cannot ignore Death!