21-04-02
Why do I choose a title my travel to tenerife…is because this choice in my
life is one of my major choices…and I have made many..maybe too many. It is my hope to find roots…even if it is kind of late in my life. This autumn I will turn 70 and now my 70th birthday will be in a new place…new
country…new people..new climate…new culture…new language…in
2 words…New Everything. Well in some ways this is not true…I have lived in these cultures for many years and have first hand live experience. In a way I am going back to roots in a way. In my life I have developed a new
personality/charachter/identity. A sharp contrast to where I come from, Sweden.
So once again I am on the road again in search for my philosphers stone(Van Morrison), where even my best friends dont even know. As a humourous comment…I dont even know! The only thing I know is..I have to go because All things must pass(George Harrisson). Throughout my writing from now on I will use quotes from my past songs/lyrics that make sense to my way of thinking and reasoning.
Gives me an idea how to give this reasoning a frame..kind of a explanation of all my craziness. And I give credit or blame to all of these lyrics in thoose songs that have influenced my life. But yes there is another radical person that have had a huge influence in my life…Jesus. He said that he had no place here on earth that he called home or where to lay his head. Pretty close to how I feel now. Right now I feel pretty good…because I am sitting here ..writing this down. I have my glas of red wine…listening to my favourite channel P1 swedish radio. So many interesting progammes and right now 2nd of april 16.40 it is a programme about how the swedish women got the right to vote….I love history in the way of what made a difference and how they
fought for this. And the word PATHOS came as fundamental word…this
feeling/emotion can move mountains. Maybe this is what will be one of my guiding word(emotions) in writing this. The balance between heart and brain.
I am a person that easily get caught up in words..suddenly I hear a word and I am like a fly caught in a spiders web. I just have to analyse this word. Last night in a documentary about the afghan resistance against the big russian army(a documentary worth watching) one word stood out…persistance. I could not go to sleep until I had all the info about this word. This word could not pass by like another word. Persistance is an amazing word that take LIFE to another level that I did not know before.
Easily it is described as elasthicity which caught my attention more than
any of the others. I was applying this to myself as to how much elasthicity I could endure before the rubber band breaks.
So here we come to the rubber band becomes a sidetrack to the mainstory. As most people know that rubber bands come in different qualities and thickness…and whatever. My point is that our personalities are in a way rubberbands. How do we react to stress, crisis, death, accidents …etc in our lifes. Why does some people survive and some go under. In studying the word persistance and also watching the documentary about this unholy/terrible war between sovjetunion and afghanistan..I kind of got the ghist/understanding of how far the rubberband/persitance can go. To my surprise and amazement…some
people gave me where the limits of persistance are….
These limits were far far from my limits. I felt so small..so nothing..so
stupid. How how could these people survive…and here the saying cannot be more true…it is the dead that are blessed…it is the living that are cursed. Death was a relief and thoose that survived…had to have persistance…this is where the rubberband comes to life. When I saw some of these rubberband people(nothing negative about these people…no way!) go on with life..with so much death in their families…so many handicaped(loss of arms, legs, sanity)to take care of. How do you define these survivors??
I found my understanding for all of this…some people have persistance a
rubberband that are far above my rubberband. I honestly felt that my rubberband is a weak kind. Not that my life has not learned many things and have taught me many lessons. But these people …cannot put it into words. I just cannot understand that there are such strong rubberbands. The strength of the rubberband is not how far it can be stretched only…but the strength is also how it can go back to a ”normal” condition. The relaxed mode. When you study personalities…persistance is one quality that makes a difference.
Anyway I am trying to analyse why I have come to this decision to move to Tenerife. There are many reasons, first of all I have a hard time living in
Sweden especially in the winter. Nearly 8 months of grey, dark, cold climate.
It gets to me and this last winter has probably been the worst winter in my life, my mental life. I live in this real small community where I have come to the conclusion that I cannot stand one more winter here. It has served its purpose as a transatory station in my life. Now it is time to pack my stuff.
The bigger stuff, furnitures and other things I am selling or giving it away. What ever comes first. I am downsizing big time. The only things I keep is what I can get into my car because I am planning to drive down to Cadiz and from there take the ferry to Tenerife. This will happen in the beginning of september this year. The flat is already out for sale also. Was thinking to sell the car but I got such a bad offer that made me angry so I rethought and now I keep it and take it with me. Which actually was a good idea.
Why Tenerife…this is an idea from my former friend here where I live now. It has a perfect climate with different climate zones. Not so far away if the children want to come and visit or if I want to visit them. Much closer than Colombia anyway which I had planned before. By the way with the excisting pandemic there is no way I will be going to Colombia. All of SouthAmerica is in a big mess and it will take a long time to bounce back.
Tenerife can be quite selfsufficient if there is an even bigger crisis in
the world. The sea is full of fish, there are good possibilities to grow just
about anything considering the different climatezones because of Teide.
I have had other options likt Greece, Kalamata. Perfect all year around
climate and fantastic nature and lots of wonderful things to do. When I visited south of Italy, the region of Puglia, is also a contender. Mainly because I love Italy and especially the rural Italy and that I also speak italian.
Another reason for choosing Tenerife is because I can speak enough
spanish(similar to italian) and I love the latin culture. The music, food,
temperament, colours…so much more me…
So right now today (4thapril) I am sitting in my flat and mostly are
focusing on getting rid of things. Some things are gone and I have nearly 5months to get rid of the rest and also focus on what I will bring with me. I have also made a good contact with a local mechanic so we will go through the car to make it ready for the ride…. I will also buy a box to put on the roof to have extra room to pack. So far I dont really know what I will take. Have to make a list. My guitars for sure..clothes..a mini bicycle..a few books..photos of the kids,,camera…etc..
This coming months to keep me occupied I got a very good summer job that will take me through the summer and also give me some more financial muscles.
